The Missing Stage: Know Your Worth

I definitely know where you're coming from. They should know whether or not they want to spend forever with you by their side; especially given the sacrifices you had made to be with them. It's not something to play around with or waste time doing. If they are hesitant when asked the question: "where is this going?"; what are you even dating for? You date to marry, or else you're just wasting time. And that's all we have. Time.

I know what it's like being in your shoes. I was with someone for two years, dropped everything for him and left with no questions asked. Because that's what you do when you love someone. You don't ask questions. You just do it. I was so fucking secluded from everyone I knew and loved for so long to be with him. It gets to you. And you would think - since I sacrificed everything for them, they would do the same.

But would they?

You either do or you don't. You either see a future or you don't. No in between bullshit. There's no wishy washy feelings when it comes to a forever with someone. If you know, you know.

I know it's never easy letting go of what you're comfortable with, but I would recommend taking time a part. Like actually leaving for a little bit. Far away if you can. If you're in the same place as them, it'll pollute your mind and confuse what is right for you, for what is no longer good. Being away from someone and not interacting with them for some time will determine if you miss the company of them, or if you can't live without them. And there's a HUGE difference between these two things.

At first, you'll miss them. Of course you will, that was your person at some point. Your rock. You fell in love with them for a reason. The comfort that they give you will form the missing stage. You'll want to text them, but don't. Give yourself space from what you know, and allow yourself peace of mind. It will open the doors to so many opportunities. Things you didn't even think imaginable. The things you want and deserve in life. You became dependent on them, and it's that thought that is making you believe that you're nothing without them. You lost yourself taking care of them and always putting them first. You should never be picking up your partners weight. You are equals. We should be independent while working as a team. All about balance: here's what we both bring to the table. For me, I was trapped in what I thought was love. Years together, that's all I knew. But I've come to realize that I was more infatuated with loving someone forever, and settled for someone that wasn't for me. Don't stand to love someone who won't love you full heartedly back. None of this half - ass love. Love is supposed to be free, light, and natural. Never, NEVER forced.

It's not you, you're entitled to your feelings, wants, and needs. You're allowed to outgrow someone.

You have to make the decision for yourself. Don't ask for advice from anyone else, because you know that at the end of the day you're going to be the deciding factor; so be your own influence. You have to realize if it's just the missing in the moment or actually not being able to live without them. Love is not one sided, and if you feel that it is; that's an answer in itself. You can't be the only one fighting; that's not how a team works. And do you really want to spend the rest of your life fighting for someone that isn't doing the same?

There's too many people in this world that are amazing and beautiful, and will match your energy. Your standards. It'll all fall into place. This one person you spent a portion of your life with, will just be another memory. Another lesson. Another lifetime. It's okay to be scared. It's okay to be sad, because they were a part of your life. But you're more important. And what you need for yourself will ALWAYS outweigh the options.

Look, you can't create the person you dream about. There's no possible way for you to embody the characteristics that you want in someone into a body that you are familiar with. You just can't. It's not realistic. They are who they are, and that's okay. But that doesn't mean that the person you dream of isn't out there. That's also not realistic. The person who's made for you is exactly how you imagine. There isn't any misconceptions. There aren't any gray areas. They know what they want, and they'll prove to you everyday why they're meant for you. They will show you your worth. You will never have to guess, and that's exactly how it should be. That's the love you deserve.

You have the whole world at your feet, take it.

xx